My Perception of the Typical Trumpkin

I’m not talking about the merely anti-Clinton voter.

This is about the people that actually support Trump, for Trump. As in, they think he will be a good President, and Make America Great Again. They believe this because they are stubbornly pig-ignorant of Trump’s actual character, as revealed through his public actions, over decades of celebrity life. There are also those who only pretend to believe, because they think they’re going to get a shot on The Apprentice or something. Or they just don’t fucking care, because they are shitty people.

The Trumpkins. Trumpians. Trumpoids. Whatever.

These are the assholes tirelessly retweeted as mockery by the likes of Jim Treacher [@jtlol] and Stephen Miller [@redsteeze]. There are, of course, many of them who are occupied in other ways, making life worse for everyone, for I have an absolute certainty that the Trumpkins do not live otherwise blameless lives.

I think they are the sort of men who go into stalls in public restrooms and piss in the general direction of the back wall, and definitely don’t wash their hands on the way out. The minority of them who are female are the ones leaving used tampons on the floor and shitting on the seats. They don’t wash their hands either.

I assume, as drivers, they customarily and constantly tailgate, fail to signal, and prefer to pass on the right. When bored with this, they drive well under the speed limit in the passing lane, pace you in your blind spot, and drive with one foot on the brake.

I doubt most Trumpkins vote in most elections, but I guarantee they always, always complain bitterly [as they do most things] about the results of elections and the actions of government at all levels, except for those few of them who sit on HOA committees and school boards and city councils. Those ones? They continually ratchet up governmental [and quasi-governmental] interference in the rest of our lives.

They’re the dumb fucks who can’t tell the difference between a mosque and a Sikh temple, much less fathom that the religions espoused within are actually different. I think the idiot who just days ago caused a two hour flight delay because she was frightened by mathematical symbols has to be a Trumpkin. How could she not?

In short, Trumpkins are the sort of garbage people who make the rest of us sort-of wish for a The Stand-style plague or Zombie Apocalypse. Then, when the Trumpkins show up following a Flagg or Negan [because of course they would], we could finally solve all their problems in an appropriate manner.


7 thoughts on “My Perception of the Typical Trumpkin”

  1. Wow, AJ; tell us how you really feel.
    Mind, I don’t disagree; especially with the first part. I think Trump is the Anti-Democrat / Anti-Hillary response to the cult of personality that is/was Barack Obama. And while two wrongs don’t make a right, in this case neither do three lefts (Obama the solidly leftist Democrat/cult-o-personality, Trump the left of center populist/cult-o-personality and Hillary the immeasurably left autocrat/automaton).
    Full disclosure: I was a Cruz/Fiorina supporter; now I’m working on my immigration papers for New Zealand.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think I share a dilemma with a lot of voters this fall- I abhor Hillary Clinton. I think she is perhaps the most dangerous candidate for president that we’ve had in my lifetime, and that includes George McGovern (McGovern was a good hearted and kind man in his personal life, but was misguided to the point that he was utterly unqualified to be president). The arrogance of power is a phrase that only begins to describe Hillary. But Donald Trump? Give me a friggin’ break. Spy Magazine captured the essence of Donald Trump a quarter of a century ago when it called him a “short-fingered vulgarian.” He has done nothing since that would lead me to question that assessment. He, like George McGovern but without McGovern’s redeeming qualities, is also unqualified to be president.

    I can’t even see holding my nose and voting for Trump. I don’t know what I’m going to do in November.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think DT is a high-order d-bag, and I wouldn’t vote for him in a sane world. In this insane world we inhabit, the Dems have nominated a person whose nastiness and incompetence has a pretty high body count. DT is a shitty person, but I’ve seen no evidence that he’s killed anyone.


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